Showing posts with label Corona virus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Corona virus. Show all posts

Monday, April 05, 2021

COVID Vaccine for You...and You...and you too.

A COVID-19 clinic waiting room. A white-haired man says to a younger woman, "I need it because I'm 85. You?" and she replies, "I also need it because you're 85."

 

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Friday, May 08, 2020

Quarantoon: Yelleworking

split screen. one side shows a man yelling at his laptop: "What? Can you repeat what you said?" on the other half of the screen is a woman yelling into he cellphone: "What? You got cut off! Say that again?!"

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Wednesday, May 06, 2020

Quarantoon: Day 45 of Lockdown

kitchen. three people, a dog, a cat, and a baby. the baby is waving a knife and fork and grinning evilly with its one tooth. the dog and cat are howling and trying to get out of the way as one person leaps across the table holding a knife, while the other one knocks over a chair while running away holding a colander over their head for protection. Grandma is reaching for another knife from the knife holder. spoons and forks have been jabbed into the table top, bowls are flying, glasses are being knocked over. one person shouts "From now on we eat food that doesn't require utensils!"

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Monday, May 04, 2020

Autotranslate: Emergency Texts from the Government

two different women staring perplexedly at their cellphones. one has a text reading "If you have high blood pressure, dry hair, or a swollen chest, call your local doctor by phone!" the other phone reads, "Follow good hygiene and keep atrophy safe!"

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Friday, May 01, 2020

The Future of Flights?

inside an airplane. only four seats, all widely spaced. passengers wearing facemasks. Cabin attendant coming up the aisle with a tray with cups on it. the cabin attendant is in full-body biohazard suit, and says "Coffee? tea?"

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Monday, April 27, 2020

Quarantoon: Carrot Soup

a pot of bubbling soup in the foreground next to a chopping board with a big knife, half a lemon, a potato, and some green onions. to the side is a table with a bowl and spoon. and across the kitchen there is a man standing in front of the open fridge. the crisper drawer is open and a carrot and a parsnip or a turnip are waving their fists. the Turnip has a sign that says "Freebom!" the Carrot yells "We're tired of being stuck in the fridge! We want out!" And the man says "Ok" with a smile.

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Sunday, April 26, 2020

Quarantoon: Power Outages

sunset in a semidark apartment. a darkened laptop on the desk, the lamp is off, a candle next to it is lit. a weight bench and scattered barbells lie about the floor, with a cat lounging on the bench. a person is talking on the cellphone. someone's voice from inside the cellphone: "The power's out again? So what do you do when that happens?" the person answers "exercise." we see that the person has grotesquely huge powerful muscles all over the body.

This is the logical outcome of converging problems: countries where the power is cut off frequently, and a time when people aren't allowed to leave home.  Any hobbies we have suddenly go into overdrive. 
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Friday, April 17, 2020

Quarantoons: 6 Quarantine-friendly Fashions!

Frame 1: The Fluffbob: a woman with red-brown hair in great disorder, sticking out in all directions, and she’s primping for the camera. Frame 2: The Natural Beard: A bald man with a giant orange beard covering most of his face and chest, growing out in wisps. he’s waving at us. Frame 3: The Fu Manchu: a blond man whose hair has grown long and straight down his back is twirling one of his extremely long mustachios around a finger. Frame 4: The Telework Twinset: a woman with her hair in an elegant bun is talking on video phone. she’s wearing a beautiful aqua suit coat, pearls, and white work blouse. and on bottom she has on giant baggy grey sweat pants. Frame 5: the 8 a.m. Shadow: a man holding a cup of coffee and giving a thumbs up - he’s wearing bifocals, a work shirt and blue tie and has long whiskers growing out randomly from his grey-shadowed chin. Frame 6: the Emoji Filter: a young woman in an orange blouse trimmed with white lace. her face has emoji images superimposed on it - two shiny red hearts over her eyes, two floppy brown puppy ears sprout fro her head, and a long rainbow unscrolls from her smiling open mouth.

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Thursday, April 16, 2020

Quarantoons: Sequestration Yoga

Need exercise but don't have enough space? Try the new Sequestration Yoga! Here are four useful poses for very crowded spaces, along with their sanskrit names. Frame 1: woman with grey ponytail squatting beneath her kitchen table: “Hunchinundatabel Pose” Frame 2: crowded kids’ bedroom. Man with red beard standing on one foot arms outstretched. A baby sleeps on his left hand. a toddler swings from his right arm. a dog perches on his uplifted knee, and a cat rubs against his ankle. “Uppahevibebi Pose” Frame 3: Woman squeezed between her kitchen table and her fridge. she’s balanced on one leg in dancer’s pose, one arm stretched behind to capture her uplifted foot. her other hand is feeding a sandwich into her face, and an open box of crackers stands on the table, along with a cereal bowl. “Findandeetamunchi Pose.” Frame 4: a tiny bathroom. Man on his back inside his shower stall. both legs stretched up above him in the waterfall pose. he’s struggling with his hands to grasp something on the slippery surface to help him get out of the pose. “Owai Kanget Auttashowa Pose”

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Monday, March 23, 2020

COVID-19 Vs Air Pollution

spiky pink beastie labeled COVID-19 menaces grey cloudy beastie labeled Air Pollution, which is slinking away terrified.
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