Sunday, November 20, 2022

Organ Donor

Suburban street. a paramedic kneels next to a pumpkin sprawled on its back, legs sticking up in the air. the neighbors stand around watching. emergeny vehicles are parked at the curb. one has a big red cross and a picture of a pie on the side. a person dressed all in white with a chef's toque on their head walks up to the fallen pumpkin, holding a cooler chest with a red cross on it in one hand, and a saw in the othe hand. they say, "is this the organ donor?"

 

Sunday, November 13, 2022

"Glow" 18

single page of graphic novel shows vilnius underwater, heavy rain, rising floods, people using a dresser as a boat, the belltower reflecting off the lake of floodwaters, and our protagonist slogging through rain and mud and floods, thinking about the glowing object she found and lost. ends with a birds-eye view long shot of vilnius under a direct rainshower, everything is blurred and pastel colored, and the river gleams silver as it courses through the forest and town.
page 18 of Glow


 "Glow" - page 18 of a 24-page graphic story.

Sunday, November 06, 2022

Cover Art for Short Story Anthologies

 Every year we publish an anthology of short stories by readers at the newssite fark.com.  I help edit it, and I do the artwork as well. Here is some of my favorite work from over the last 5 years.

Steamboat/Riverboat Casino theme for 2019


an element from every story in the anthology is shown being dragged into the wormhole - holy smokes, we had a story about a virus the very year before Covid 19 broke out!  should we feel guilty?

Mystery - woodcut style illustration of Magyck the goat dressed as a victorian detective, smoking a pipe, standing beneath a tall streetlamp, walking stick in his other hand.
each year the antho is divided into 4 genres. Majyck the goat, a character in one of our first stories (by Brian Bander)  has become our unofficial mascot.  This year we opted for woodcut-style illustrations. here he is as a victorian detective, for our Mystery genre.

Magyck the goat as woodcut illustration of a dancing skeleton
Magyck the goat as woodcut illustration of a dancing skeleton for the Horror genre

magyck the goat as a medieval woodcut of a sea monster
magyck the goat as a medieval woodcut of a sea monster for the Fantasy tab

Magyck the goat crossed with a chicken eating a banana - obviously for the comedy section!

The squirrel is our other mascot. better not to ask.  But he has a penchant for sitting on slatted chairs.
 

yup. you're gonna need help pretty soon, squirrel.  this is from 2021, the year we all stayed home (if we were very lucky) and read books while death stalked the streets.

2020. the year the Plague hit.  Our sympathies to those who lost loved ones.


Majik makes us feel better, even when eating priceless antique manuscripts.


Wednesday, November 02, 2022

The Little Prince and the Queen

a small ripoff of the great Antoine de Saint Exupery. Just a gift for some friends:  a couple whose travel photos included one picture of him as a long-haired youth wandering the sere lands of central Asia. happy and burned, and lots of photos of her sitting at a table alone smiling at some exotic breakfast, lunch, tea, dinner, snack. Presumably he joined her after taking the photo.
 

Sunday, October 30, 2022

Halloween swap meet

dog and cat dressed in costumes, going through their halloween candy.

 

Saturday, October 29, 2022

Pumpkin Pineapple

two pumpkins. one has a spiky green headdress and crosshatch marks on its face so that it looks like a pumpkin. the other pumpkin says, "Ha! great costume!"

 

Saturday, October 15, 2022

Scary News

Night time. A mummy and tentatcled monster sit on a park bench in a pool of light. The tentacled 3-eyed monster is eating a blueberry muffin and holding a cup of to-go coffee. the mummy is reading a news paper, and says, "I just can't come up with anything scarier than this stuff."

 

Monday, October 10, 2022

Indigenous People's Day

A car driving into Bkejwanong Territory. one person says "what 's the right way to greet someone from a first nation?" The other person answers, "Try 'hello.'"

 

Sunday, October 09, 2022

Normal costume? What's that?

 

 

Saturday, September 10, 2022

4 Types of Videoconference Users

Camera Savvy (perfect hair, clothes, lighting, props). Distracted (children wandering into the study, crying). Clueless (super closeup of an eyeball, someone shouting "hello!"). Forgetful (someone briskly picking their nose while on camera).

 

Sunday, August 21, 2022

Do Sharks Have a 30-Second Rule?

two sharks in the deep blue ocean. one has a human foot sticking out of its mouth. the other shark says, "Don't eat that. You have no idea where it's been!"

 

Saturday, August 13, 2022

Interview with a Mayfly

business setting. Mayfly sitting in an office chair. person behind desk writing in folder, says, "So, Ms. Mayfly, where do you see yourself in five years?"

 

Tuesday, August 09, 2022

Interview with a Caterpillar

a woman in a wheelchair is interviewing a large black and yellow caterpillar in a business office in a high-rise building. the caterpillar stares at her as she asks, "To tell me, what do you hope to achieve this year?"

 

Saturday, August 06, 2022

Land Shark

a rocky asteroid in deep space. astronauts have landed and are reading an engraved sign on a boulder. the plain behind them is littered with smaller boulders, rocks, pebbles, scree. one astronaut holds up a device to the sign, and says, "wait, ok, i've got it. it says, 'beware...land...shark.'" a triangle that could be a rock but isn't is cuttin across the surface of the ground towards them.

 

Sunday, July 31, 2022

Hot & Cold

A couple in pajamas, brushing their teeth. (the cat is also brushing its teeth). Frame 2: they are all asleep, the ceiling fan whirling above them. Frame 3: she opens her eyes, glares at the fan. Frame 3: muttering curses, she pulls on a sweater. Frame 4: she continues to shiver. Frame 5: more curses, she gets out of bed, and retrieves something from a bureau drawer. Frame 7: she jams a knitted cap on her head. Frame 8: she's under all the blankets when he sits up in bed and turns off the fan with a "click." last frame: he continues to sleep comfortably while she heats up, flames shooting out from her sweater collar and under her cap, her face flushed red with overheating..

 

Sunday, July 24, 2022

Bonsai Desert Island

a castaway in ragged clothing sits sulking on a small desert island in the middle of a huge blue-purple sea sparkling with sunlight. a palm tree casts shade. but it's a bonsaid palm tree - only a few centimeters high.

 

Sunday, July 17, 2022

the Vegan Shark

Three sharks in the big blue ocean. one says, "I thought you went vegan." The second one, who is munching on a human leg, says, "I did! this is plant-based." The third shark peers closely at the foot, and says, "Wow, super realistic!"

 

Sunday, July 10, 2022

Cauliflower Fairy Tales

A big califlower sits in an overstuff easy chair with two little cauliflowers on its lap, and reads a children's book: Little red Riding Hood" the children look frightened, and the adult reads, "And the big bad vegan jumped out of bed and gobbled up little red riding hood!" the back cover of the book shows a human eating a terrified piece of broccoli.

 

Friday, June 24, 2022

Underwater Hotel

big deep blue ocean. a humongous fish or shark drifts along with its toothy mouth wide open. two tiny fish swim towards it. one says, "it's been a long trip and i'm tired. let's just stay at the first place that's open." the other fish swims into the maw, saying, "How about here?"

 

Monday, June 20, 2022

Solstice 2022

deep in a dark trench in the ocean, a lantern fish yells "Happy solstice, everyone!" the others roll their eyes. the chambered nautilus says, "Oy veh, here we go again." the whiplash squid says, "so embarrassing" the hadal snailfish says, "She does this every 182 days." the dinnerplate jellyfish says, "What's a day?"

 

Green Dog Cafe: Juneteenth 2022


 

Sunday, June 12, 2022

4 Medical Excuses to get you out of anything!


 

Sunday, June 05, 2022

Kakao Karten - Artist Trading Cards 1-8 or maybe 1-9

https://www.kakao-karten.de/benutzer/19542/galerie










 

Sunday, March 27, 2022

DIY - Four New Do-It-Yourself Tasks

Do it yourself:  we used to have experts help us with important things.  Now we have to be our own lawyers, publishers, travel agents, and accountants.  What's next?

 

Sunday, March 20, 2022

Equinox 2022

Rolling green hills, Stonehenge at sunset. Two druids are looking to one side at a tumbled pile of boulders. one says, "That? Oh, it's last year's calendar."

 

Friday, March 04, 2022

Run Rabbit!

Scene: office at the greyhound racetrack. a sleazy guy in a suit holds out a pen and a contract, smiling. the rabbit looks at the contract and says, "Well, the pay is great, so i guess i'm in. But why did the last rabbit quit?" in a window behind the rabbit you see the stadium, the racetrack, and, - pressing its nose against the window - a fierce muzzed greyhound, staring at the rabbit.

 

Monday, February 21, 2022

Minced Oath Day 2022


 
a multipanel strip showing people in medieval clothes and village. opening line: “One Fine February 26th:” closeup of a quill writing on paper, squirting ink. a voice shouts: “Gadsbudlikins! thou incontinent quill of an unwiped pigeon!” the author, and enraged woman with ink stained fingers shouts at a maidservant: “clean this mess, beslubbering scut! “ then the author summons a young person and gives them the parchment, saying “here, unhandsome hornbeast! take this forthwith to that leptus-leering swag-bellied rampallion of a printer that She may publish it forthwith!” Then the young person marches angrily across the village muttering, “witless deck.” at the print house, the printer - a woman in an ink-stained apron yells, “what kept thee, tardy-gaited pin-buttock? it’s nigh midnight!” then grabs a tray and turns to the printing press, yelling at a nearby little kid, “fetch a bolt of cotton-picking paper, thou lumpish Rabbit-sucker!” and the kid runs off, thinking, “Horrid bugbear!” At dawn the printer hands a stack of papers out of the window to a young person, saying “sell these all by noon, and no shoving them into the sewers like last year, cautelous princox!” the young person carries the stack away thinking, “Facinerous quatch-buttock!” last frame: the young paper seller stands on a corner shouting, “Read all about it! it’s national minced oath day!” and a swashbuckling young woman marches up taking a coin out of her belt, saying “gimme a doggone copy.”

Sunday, February 06, 2022

How does moving make you feel?

A couple are packing up their household. the moving van is visible at the curb; it's filled with boxes and things wrapped in quilts. inside, stacks of boxes fill the room, a cat is hiding on a shelf and another cat and dog are getting in the way. One person dances around the room waving a chiffon scarf, and says, "moving makes me feel so light and free!" The other person kneels on the floor scowling, rolling up a carpet, and says, "not me."

 

Sunday, January 16, 2022

You Are Marching: MLK, Trekkie

Frame 1: we see a drawing of MLK at about 10, in his best sunday suit and tie, giving the vulcan salute and smiling. “You are marching,” Martin Luther King Jr., Trekkie. Frame 2: a picture of the Starship Enterprise flying through the deep space “one of MLK’s contributions to civil rights began with his love of star trek. Frame 3: Two little children watching a 1960’s era television on which Mr. Spock can be seen. “it was the only TV show he allowed his children to stay up and watch.” Fram 4: a picture of a beautiful young black woman in a Star Trek uniform busy at the communications console of a spaceship. “One day, at an NAACP fundraiser, he met Nichelle Nichols, who played Lieutenant Commander Uhura.” Fram 5: We see King and Uhura at a gala ball, chatting together. “Ms Nichols had just that week decided to leave the show. MLK advised her not to. “You are marching,” he said.” Frame 6: We see a little Whoopi Goldberg, only 9 years old, running happily in her living room, shouting “Come quick! Come quick! There’s a black lady on TV and she ain’t no maid!”. “so she stayed...and was an inspiration for generations to come. “ Frame 7: A scene of the bridge on the starship, with 9 women in uniforms sitting and standing. “as Captain Kirk said, and all the other captains would agree, There is no room for bigotry on the bridge.” there are many other women captains in Star Trek - i just didn’t have enough room. Names of the captains shown here Capt. Erika Benteen Capt. Phillipa Louvois Capt. Rachel Garrett Capt. Tryla Scott Capt. Silva La Forge Capt. Philippa Georgiou Capt. Michael Burnham Capt. Kathryn Janeway Capt. Kasidy Yates-Sisko

 Happy Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.

Sources:  https://screenrant.com/star-trek-female-captains/  | http://www.yurtopic.com/society/people/mlkjr-facts.html| Https://www.npr.org/2011/01/17/132942461/Star-Treks-Uhura-Reflects-On-MLK-Encounter

Wednesday, January 05, 2022

ZBS - Mojo's Cafe for Lost Dreamers

visit ZBS.org to buy, listen, and donate!


 


Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)