Gentoons

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Showing posts with label yoga. Show all posts
Showing posts with label yoga. Show all posts

Sunday, February 16, 2025

Headstand

Two people walking in the park wearing athletic clothing and one carrying a yoga mat. His face is just blank skin, and all his features are crowded on top of his skull. The other person says, “how long were you in that headstand?”

 

at February 16, 2025
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Labels: athlete, exercise, headstand, skin, sport, yoga

Sunday, June 25, 2023

Enlightenment

Woman meditating on a floor mat, peeks at her watch, and thinks, "Come on, Enlightenment, i haven't got all day!"

 

at June 25, 2023
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Labels: enlightenment, focus, hurry, meditation, time, yoga

Wednesday, July 22, 2020

Yoga (Mugging) in the Park


People doing yoga in the park have left their bags, wallets, and purses out on the grass near by. A robber comes by, points a gun at them as they are touching their toes, and shouts "Reach for the sky! No, wait...uh...reach for the ground!"
at July 22, 2020
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Labels: criminal, exercise, holdup, money, park, robbery, yoga

Monday, May 18, 2020

4 Things Yogis Worry About


Yogi #1: thinking "please don't say it in sanskrit, please don't say it in sa-" and the teacher says "Dho mukha svanasana." Yogi #2: doing the back bend Camel Pose, thinking, "What if i can't get back up?" Yogi #3 speaking for several people in class who are all examining different bits of their bodies, "Teacher? We don't actually know what a sacrum is." Yogi #4: doing a downward dog pose, thinking "This" (is what we worry about) as a tiny fart escapes.
at May 18, 2020
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Labels: camel, class, dog, exercise, fart, gym, gymnasium, language, student, teacher, yoga

Friday, May 15, 2020

Yoga Half-Moon Pose


Yoga studio. all the students are doing half-moon pose, which means touching the ground with one hand, standing on one leg, the other leg and arm high in the air. one student's tight yoga pants have just ripped at the seat, revealing lacy teal underwear, and she's blushing bright red as the teacher yells "I said HALFmoon pose, not full moon!" yes....an underwear joke. what can i say? i'm in lockdown and no one can stop me from drawing underwear jokes.
at May 15, 2020
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Labels: exercise, pants, student, studio, teacher, underwear, yoga

Thursday, April 16, 2020

Quarantoons: Sequestration Yoga

Need exercise but don't have enough space? Try the new Sequestration Yoga! Here are four useful poses for very crowded spaces, along with their sanskrit names. Frame 1: woman with grey ponytail squatting beneath her kitchen table: “Hunchinundatabel Pose” Frame 2: crowded kids’ bedroom. Man with red beard standing on one foot arms outstretched. A baby sleeps on his left hand. a toddler swings from his right arm. a dog perches on his uplifted knee, and a cat rubs against his ankle. “Uppahevibebi Pose” Frame 3: Woman squeezed between her kitchen table and her fridge. she’s balanced on one leg in dancer’s pose, one arm stretched behind to capture her uplifted foot. her other hand is feeding a sandwich into her face, and an open box of crackers stands on the table, along with a cereal bowl. “Findandeetamunchi Pose.” Frame 4: a tiny bathroom. Man on his back inside his shower stall. both legs stretched up above him in the waterfall pose. he’s struggling with his hands to grasp something on the slippery surface to help him get out of the pose. “Owai Kanget Auttashowa Pose”

at April 16, 2020
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Labels: baby, bathroom, bedroom, cat, children, Corona virus, COVID, crowds, dad, dog, exercise, food, isolation, kitchen, parents, Quarantine, shower, snack, social distancing, yoga
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